Don't Get Me Started with Linda Sharp

Ariel Controversy All Wet

File this under "Something That's REALLY Important" to white people.

Disney, ramping up to produce yet another live action take on a cartoon feature - this time The Little Mermaid - has cast a young black woman to play Ariel.

With the announcement that the gorgeous and talented Halle Bailey has been cast, the rending of white people garments commenced once again.  (Glad they found another outlet for their outrage.  It's not like there are little kids in cages drinking out of toilets or anything.)

<insert eye roll so extreme you see not only the inside of your eyelids but the back of your skull as well>

The horror, shock, angst, and cries of "What will we tell our children?" rang out across all social media platforms.  The Twittersphere exploded as mothers took to their accounts and began each #NotMyAriel missive with, "I'm not a racist, but..."

Clue for you pathetic folk - when you start a sentence with that caveat?  You really negate everything that comes after.  And in this case, yes, you are a racist.

And dumber than a goddamned doorknob.

Let's start with the basics here - the story of The Little Mermaid is not one brainstormed by the minds at Disney.  No, the author of the fairy tale was Hans Christian Andersen.  Written in 1837, it combines hope, angst, morality, unrequited love, and redemption.  It also combines a lot of blood and the prospect of murder.

Hmmmm, I don't remember those parts from the Disney version.  Must have been too distracted by the lobster Sebastian trilling Under The Sea.

This gnashing of teeth is ridiculous.  These are the same people who lost their shit when the idea of Idris Elba was tossed around as the next James Bond - ANOTHER FICTIONAL CHARACTER. 

What will you tell your children?  Is your parenting game seriously that weak?  Here's what you tell your poor cherubs, who incidentally, won't give shit ONE until you make it known they should through your race-y rants:  "She is an amazing actress!  Listen to how clear as a bell her voice is!  Do you want more popcorn?"

It's that simple. 

As for the completely asinine attempts at deflection?  This one is my favorite.  "That would be like someone making a movie about Oprah Winfrey, and hiring a white girl to play Oprah."

Um, no, not the same thing at all, but thanks for playing.  Oprah Winfrey is a real person.  Ariel is a made up MERMAID.

JFC, these idiots get exhausting.  Curious to know where all their concern was when these cinematic choices were playing out?

How about Avatar: The Last Airbender?  Characters all written and drawn based on Asian and Inuit cultures, yet white actors cast in most roles, including Aang, played by Texan, Noah Ringer.  (I will note that Paramount did ultimately recast Zuko from Jessie McCartney?!? to Dev Patel.)

And where were all these bereft soccer moms ready to run their minivans off the road when Jason Momoa was cast as Aquaman - another fishy fellow, drawn exclusively white with blond hair?  Hmmm, I guess it's ok when the casting helps you escape your beer gutted, bad breathed, bald spotted husband with fantasies of Khal Drogo with gills.

My favorite one to point out, however, is this.  Their hero.  He shows up in their Twitter bios.  They claim Him as the leader of their lives.  Jesus, the white boy with blue eyes from the Hamptons.  They have zero interest in authenticity when it comes to Him.  They cling to their Bee Gee Jesus, who based on geography alone had dark brown to black hair, olive skin, and brown eyes.

Talk about whitewashing.

This controversy is indicative of so much white fragility it is embarrassing.  Personally I love this casting choice for Ariel.  I love it for her voice, her acting talent, and quite frankly, because I have had 70 years of Disney catering to my white ass.  My heart is thrilled that little black girls will see themselves represented.  Hell, I am thrilled that black women will see themselves represented, because fairy tales are for everyone.  This casting does not diminish the character we all know from the animated version.  It enhances her.  Just listen.

#NotMyAriel? Watch this video of Halle Bailey singing "Unforgettable" and you can change your mind 😉 We think she's got the perfect voice for Ariel! pic.twitter.com/g18KYnWRq2

— Dumpling Says (@DumplingSays) July 5, 2019

Again, this is based on a fairy tale.  About creatures who do not exist.  About creatures who do not speak with a Jamaican accent or sing Kiss The Girl love serenades.  This is fantasy.  Which means it can be anything. 

But if you tightasses insist on authenticity, then you had better get your petitions to Disney started now to stay strictly with the original writing by HCA. 

Make sure they include the gore:  Then she cut off the mermaid’s tongue, so that she became dumb, and would never again speak or sing. “If the polypi should seize hold of you as you return through the wood,” said the witch, “throw over them a few drops of the potion, and their fingers will be torn into a thousand pieces.”

Blood every time Ariel takes a step: She climbed with the prince to the tops of high mountains; and although her tender feet bled so that even her steps were marked, she only laughed, and followed him.

Murder, encouraged by her sisters: She has given us a knife: here it is, see it is very sharp. Before the sun rises you must plunge it into the heart of the prince; when the warm blood falls upon your feet they will grow together again, and form into a fish’s tail, and you will be once more a mermaid.

Loss, because Ariel does not get the Prince: The little mermaid, dressed in silk and gold, held up the bride’s train;

Suicide: She cast one more lingering, half-fainting glance at the prince, and then threw herself from the ship into the sea, and thought her body was dissolving into foam. 

All MUCH easier to explain to your delicate flowers than a beautiful, young, talented woman with skin darker than their cartoon DVD character playing a live action version.  How did you handle Will Smith - A BLACK MAN! - as the Genie?!?!  Bluewashing ok with you?

I am heartened at how many have taken to mocking these poor excuses for human beings.  Their #NotMyAriel hashtag taken over by supporters pointing out repeatedly just how specious is their argument, how telling it is about who they are as people.

This amazing young woman is going to be glorious in this role.  Period.

And hey, director Rob Marshall?  One last thing - Forget the James Bond hullabaloo.  Cast Idris as Triton, STAT.

 

The Transitioning of a Mindset

We are born.  We die.  And in between, with the years we are given, we try.

We try to learn.  We try to explore.  We try to work, to play, to figure out just what our purpose may be.

For the majority of people, they enter this world wearing the proper skin.  The "size" fits the being inside.  Not too big, not too small, just right.  The features reflect the feeling inside.  The soul rests comfortably within the fleshy cocoon the world sees.  They get on with the business of living, not giving a thought to the peace that comes so easily, the contentment they are not even aware they enjoy.

But for some, the business of living is overshadowed from a very early age.  Their "skin" is ill fitting; it chafes against their soul.  How did this happen?  Why does my skin feel loose?  Tight?  Wrong?  Why do I look in the mirror and see an outside that is as mismatched to my inside as are stripes when worn with plaids?

Last night the world got a lesson in this very topic.  It was heart wrenching, heartbreaking, eye opening, tear inducing.  

Bruce Jenner, who my generation knew first as an Olympic god, the stuff of Wheaties execs wet dream$, took a leap of faith and allowed the world to hear his story.  

Bruce Jenner is transgender.

For many, many months tabloids have done what they do - mock, conjecture, and demean - stalking him as his appearance began to change.  Desperate to get the scoop, snap the picture of even a fingernail polish sighting, he was been hounded relentlessly.  Whispers of transitioning gave way to headlines shouting the salacious, ignoring the human being.  

It has been shameful, but then that is what this society has turned in to.  A cabal of slobbering misfits who believe they have a right to know, right now, everything.

Now, had it not been for his turn on the televised bag of air known as Keeping Up With The Kardashians, Bruce could have moved forward with his transition quietly, kept it a family confidence as much as possible.  But part of the deal with the Kardashian fame devil is that his once quiet withdrawal to civilian life as an aging post Olympian, placed him back in the spotlights.

And while Mother Kris, Kim K, and her siblings may draw their very life force from being constantly spoken about, Tweeted on, and photographed, Bruce never seemed to fit in their fame suck world.  

But then, as he told the world last night, truly fitting has been a struggle his entire life. 

Yes, like most transgender individuals, Bruce has known from very early on that who he is inside was not matched by the "skin" reflected in the mirror.

Watching his interview with Diane Sawyer, I saw a person - almost caterpillar-like, literally changing into a butterfly before my eyes.  With each word that came out, each expression of his feelings, his struggles, his knowing but being suffocated by fear for so very long, I could see what I wish all people could see:  A human being.  Fragile, frightened, but desperate to finally live his essential truth.  To be who he has always known he has been.

Her.

That is not "mental illness."  It is not "sick" and he is not a "freak" as I have seen so many deride him on comment boards.

Bruce simply exists on the very real spectrum where we all reside.  He simply resides at a less occupied spot.   The spectrum includes straight, gay, lesbian, trans, bi, pan, non-binary, and so many more labels - if we must use labels.

Being in a majority spot on the spectrum doesn't make you better, more relevant, more deserving of respect, dignity, acceptance.  It just means your skin happened to fit you when you were born.  How lucky for your accident of birth.

I am completely sickened by those who proudly trumpet their ignorance, foment their hatred, and hide behind their "straight privilege."

Yes, straight privilege.  If you happened to be born as a heterosexual, you have zero idea how easily you stride through life.  Because you have always been able to easily stride through life.

Falling anywhere else on the spectrum sets you up for a life of fear, suspicion, held breaths, an increased risk of suicide.

It is that last one that is not the fault of the individual, but the fault of a society that needs to grow the fuck up.  A society which marginalizes, demeans, bullies, beats, and even kills those who are different.

My stomach turns to think of the children and teens trapped in households where parents care more about biblical brainwashing than true love.  Where their every waking moment is the stuff of nightmares.  Existing in an atmosphere where they must hide who they are, lie, deflect, and where they slowly die inside, unable to trust the very people they should be able to trust the most.

Then there are the ones who can contain it no more, and take a leap of faith, telling their parents they are gay, bi, trans, pan, et al.  So many find themselves homeless, abandoned, kicked out, disowned.  Bible verses and slurs thrown in their faces.  Condemnation swift, hateful, and hot.

The suicide attempt rate for young trans individuals who have been ostracized, bullied, abused at school is 78%.

Let that number sink in.  78%.

To those who still want to hide ignorantly behind comments like "it's a choice"?  Really?  How stupid are you?  Would YOU CHOOSE to be something with a suicide attempt rate of 78%?

Outside of school/schoolaged, the suicide attempt rate for trans individuals is over 40%.

To call it unacceptable is an understatement.  Being who you are should not be a death sentence.  Killing one's self should not be the better option to living with society's backass notions and behaviors.

Look, as a parent, I bought in when they were born.  Better, worse, good, bad, however the flowers blossomed, as it were.  My love has never been conditioned upon meeting some bullshit societal expectations and prejudices.  My list of requirements for my three daughters is simple:

HAPPY and ALIVE.

That's it.  

My job as their parent is to insure their success rate at both objectives.  My contribution is unwavering love, security, unquestionable devotion, and the bone deep understanding that I LOVE THE PEOPLE THEY ARE.

Where anyone gets the ass to run down those who are born different than themselves, I have no idea.  The balls it takes to tell someone else who they are is staggering.  You don't have to understand.  That is not required.  Wallow in your stupidity, refuse to expand your education about life around you, or continue to hide behind your religion's dictates.  That's fine.  But what you don't get to do is insert yourself into someone else's life and deny them who they know they are.

That mindset is a certitude born of mob mentality, group think, safety in numbers, and majority rules. 

And it doesn't work.  It hurts people.  For no other reason than that they don't fit into some preconceived mold.  And as we see constantly, differences scare the bejeezus out of small minded people.

Bruce Jenner will continue to transition.  And I hope he will continue to advocate for those who are not insulated by money and fame.  I wish him, as he becomes the her she has always been, peace, love, acceptance, and the ability to finally breathe fully and freely in this life.

Last night was the beginning of a societal conversation.  Not just about Bruce, but about every Bruce in this world.

Let's hope that the dialogue continues and as Bruce continues his transition, society finally starts theirs.

Rock Of Ages? Well, It ... ROCKS!

UPDATE:  As the reviews continue to come in, so very many are from the deathly dry critics who are choosing to rip the movie apart.  Look, not every movie has to be as deep as the ocean or tell a tale just as wide.  It is a fun romp, a ride through an era of music that was at once both amazing and absurd. And for the record?  Yes, I am 40 something, so the soundtrack is from my high school years, but I saw it with my 18 and 15 year old daughters and they loved every minute, too.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Years ago I came home from a showing of the musical turned movie musical, Mamma Mia.  I said then that it was the kind of experience where you just have to let go and enjoy the ride.

I now add Rock Of Ages to that particular playlist.

It was a wheel of brie from start to finish, but it was the some of the best cheese I have ever had.

The soundtrack is pulled straight from the best years of my youth - the 80s - and handled ably by every member of this starstudded cast.  Songs are vamped, mashed up, and used to move the storyline forward, but they never stray from their original roots and the singers deliver them home.

Julianne Hough has solidly left the glitter ball of DWTS behind for good.  She is a star in her own right.  Only two complaints - one, for a singer who has the ability to open up and wail, she uses her baby voice a lot, and two, quite frankly, no one should be allowed to have thighs like hers.

Diego Boneta is a dreamboat.  He rocks, he rolls, he's sensitive.  He's the boy you wanted to be in the backseat with when Journey played on the radio in high school.

Alec Baldwin and Russell Brand, quite literally, steal the movie during their inevitable duet.  I'll leave it to you to go see...

Catherine Zeta Jones plays uptight-twat-with-a-past like none other. 

Paul Giamatti leaves the serious roles behind to slide into Rock of Ages as the oiliest of rock managers.  He and his "rat tail" are a sight to behold.

Mary J. Blige can belt an 80s anthem and rock more wigs in 15 minutes than you would think is humanly possible.

Malin Ackerman - who knew she could sing, let along SING? - has some of the "bravest" scenes in cinema.  Allowing Tom Cruise to sing into your ass crack?  Maybe not Oscar worthy, but certainly an Asscar nominee.

Which brings us to Tom.  Yes, he has his self inflicted reputation of nutjobbery when it comes to Scientology, but I give the man props - he can sing, and as Stacee Jaxx, as he did with Les Grossman in Tropic Thunder - HE. GOES. FOR. IT.  In fact, it is his portrayal of a deeply lonely, desperate for true validation Jaxx that grounds this helium filled balloon.  (Special props to him for donning assless chaps and a codpiece that must be seen to be believed.)

Do not go into this movie expecting War and Peace.  This is Fun and Frolic.  The music is a joyride, the storyline a simply fun romp, and the ending is smile inducing.

Seriously, we all had smiles, ear-to-ear.

So jump on your REO Speedwagon and take a Journey into the 80s.  If you just let go, if you Wanna Rock, if you Don't Stop Believin', and if you are Lookin' For Nothin' But A good Time, then for a little over 2 hours, it will be Just Like Living In Paradise.

Oh Russell, Oh, Alec...

(That's a compliment.)

Matt Liar?

Another one bites the .. um ... bust dust?

If reports are to be believed, it appears his wife was left wondering Where In The World Is Matt Lauer earlier this year.

If true, it would not be the first time allegations of infidelity on his part have touched their marriage.  Back in 2006 they separated amid affair rumors, her going so far as to file for divorce - withdrawing the papers several weeks later.

Whispers include a 26 year old woman, partying during the Olympics in Vancouver.

Is it true?

Remains to be seen.

For now, both Matt and Annette are releasing statements through publicists denying the allegations.  But sadly, these days the "where there's smoke, there's a liar" axiom pans out more and more often.  (OK, ok, I took a little editorial license with that...)

Regardless of whether or not this latest salcious story proves true, it does make me wonder, as I asked a friend on FB this morning, Is it that HARD for these guys to keep it in their pants?

Look, I realize that with celebrity status comes temptation.  And if you're even passably attractive, especially as a man, you will find no end of woman of little self respect, moral fiber, and self esteem willing to drop trou just for the "honor" of being with you.

But come on.  Each person, regardless of fame, fortune, money, or title, comes equipped with the ability to JUST SAY NO (although Tiger proved a pretty dismal representative of that Nike tagline...).

(As I also noted in my FB comment,  Poor things are victims, you know. Galavanting Penis Syndrome. It's a disease. NOT.)

Why then do so many find that two letter word so hard to form and utter?

Most cheating begins as a crime of opportunity.  Doing it because you are a self indulgent prick (and that applies to women just as much) who doesn't think he/she will get caught by their spouse/sig other.  And once they get away with it, they do it again, and again, and again - until they do get caught, at which point they are so very sorry for my actions.

Bull and shit.  Your actions are sorry all right.  But when getting caught is the only reason you stop?  That's not remorse over the actions, that's remorse over getting busted.

Do you really think Tiger Woods would have stopped?  Puh-sleez.

If you are in a relationship and are tempted, distracted, or unhappy enough to contemplate straying, man up or woman up, and end one thing before you move onto another.  Don't hedge your bets by cheating while maintaining some illusion with your spouse or partner.

Trust is the biggest gift two people can give one another.  And when one person takes a big steamy dump on it, the damage is irrevocable.  I don't care if some people manage to muddle through an affair and stay together, it leaves a scar on the heart of the one whose trust was violated.

Marriage isn't easy.  It isn't always exciting.  There are periods where you can't stand the sight of one another, and then periods where puppy love washes over you once again.  Even the best marriages require work, renewal, the permission to ebb and flow. 

And people, even deeply committed people still look at the opposite sex.  We're human beings, we're wired that way.  But as the saying goes, looking at the menu and ordering from it are two very different things.

If your marriage or committment has reached a point of total dissatisfaction for you, gone to a gray area where you begin to seriously look / lust after an outside source, that's OK - it happens.  Just do your partner, and ultimately yourself, the courtesy of ending one thing before you start another.  People would much rather have their hearts broken and lives changed via honesty and candor than violation.

As for Matt and Annette?  Who knows?  Answer?  Sadly, if there is truth to this, we soon all will.  When fame is involved, these things always come out in the end.  (See Tiger, Edwards, James, Boreanaz...)

And the only one who wins is the one who sells their story to the highest bidder. 

Speechless

Wow.  Just wow.

I know I say that a lot when something so stupid, so heinous, so vile, so outlandish just leaves me staring openmouthed at the source.

This is one of those times.

But I'll try to put a few more words together.

This is Kenneth Kyle, 47, of California.  Excuse me, Professor Kenneth Kyle.

A professor of public affairs and administration at Cal State East Bay, he found his private affairs being administered in a courtroom on March 15.  Authorities had found hundreds of images of child porn on his home computer and laptop.

That's bad enough.  Really.  You could stop there.  Anyone who thinks there is something sexual about children is wasting the precious oxygen supply on this planet and should do us all a favor and stuff a giant zucchini up their ass. (See yesterday's article on suicide.)

But no.  Vile Kyle was not content with imagery. 

Kyle traveled to St. Louis where he met up with a 20 year old college student he had met online - Tessa Vanvlerah.  Police say he had traveled to see "her" four times in the past five months.

I say "her" because apparently she was more of a means to an end.

 No, he was interested in her 13 month old daughter.

Who she let him abuse repeatedly.

He is locked up in a California jail charged with statutory rape, statutory sodomy and promoting child pornography  Vanvlerah is jailed in St. Louis County - same charges +1 of incest.

13 months old.

THIRTEEN MONTHS OLD.

The trauma, the horror, the pain, the complete anniliation of trust.  That poor child - it absolutely breaks my heart.

The tiny girl was treated at the hospital for her injuries and is in state custody.

This story comes one day after the story of this twosome made news:

She is Angela Blackwell, 45.  He is Johnnie Griffin, 67 - both of Michigan.

Their crime?

Angela allowed Johnnie to have sex with the ten 10 year old girl she was caring for in exchange for cocaine.  Repeatedly.  From September to February.

A ten year old girl.  A sixty-seven year old man.

Actually strike that.  He is no man.  He is a pathetic sack of flesh and bone.  Calling him, or Kyle, a "man" does a disservice to real men everywhere.

Real men being the ones who understand that the children of this world are to be cared for, cherished, protected.

Angela is in jail awaiting a hearing.  Johnnie is on the run - police are looking for him.

The most horrible part of these two stories is that I know, just as you do, that these are just the ones that have been ferreted out.  How many poor, defenseless babies, toddlers, children are treated this way every single day?  As I sit here typing I know that somewhere a child is crying out in pain, not understanding what is happening to them, just knowing with every fiber of their tiny being that it is so very wrong.

And my hearts breaks.

Throw these people into the general population of the prison system.  And then walk away.  I imagine much more than their hearts will be broken in very short order.

Again ... Wow.  Just wow.

Shucking & Jiving Is Better Than Shanking & Dying, Right?

Those fleet footed Filipino prisoners are at it again.  :O)  It gets good and, um, colorful, around 2:52.

Daring To Care

"Strangers are friends you have yet to meet" or so the saying goes.

I believe that.  This blogmunity proves that every single day.  The sharing and caring that takes place here in simple boxes of black and white text has managed to spill over and color many of our real world lives. 

And with each exchange of ideas, each baring of a soul, each cyberhand that reaches out to console - we become more than what we are online.  We become friends.  And we yearn for the day the friendships are solidified with a face to face meeting and a hug as warm as the words which have gone before it online.

Yes, things sometimes grow contentious in the comments, but it is typically out of emotion and conviction, not hatred or true malice.

Through DGMS I am constantly reminded how many good people populate this marble of ours.  And with the holiday season on top of us again, and donations beginning to come into Yes, Virginia, I am reminded more than ever that a serious amount of trust has been built up through this blog, a serious amount of trust in me.

And it is a trust I would never betray.  For it is a gift in this world to be on the receiving end of such faith.

Some people have no compunction about screwing with faith and trust, however.

Meet Trista Lathern of central Texas.

Trista's story was compelling, heartwrenching.  The kind that makes friends, and total strangers alike, rally to support.

A young wife and mother, struck down with breast cancer, undergoing chemotherapy, her hair gone.

Co-workers donated their vacation time to Trista.  People rallied, throwing a benefit this past August, raising $10,000 to help her in her fight.

Only there was no fight.  There was no cancer.  There was only a bald head - shaved by Trista to help in the subterfuge - and a willful intent to defraud honest, caring people of their money.  How did she use it? 

For a boob job.  To "save her marriage."

Yeah.

(She had married the father of her two children this past April.  He has filed an annulment - having been just as rooked as the community by her lies.  She had fully convinced him she was fighting cancer before they got married.)

She has been arrested on theft by deception charges.

Look, cancer is heinous, it cares not who it grows inside - mothers, fathers, grandparents, children - and those who are fighting the real fight for life deserve all the support they can get.  So when some societal leech like this comes along, it makes a caring public less quick to care, more skeptical than they wish they were.

Hopefully she and her new boobs can rot in prison for a while.  Maybe as her hair slowly grows back it will slowly begin to dawn on her that what she did was more than wrong, more than a crime.  It was a violation of trust.

Which brings me back to Yes, Virginia and this blogmunity.  Vetting every story sent to me is paramount in using this fund for ANYTHING.  I make phone calls.  I send emails.  I ask for verification when it is needed.  And when it comes to the gifts delivered at Christmas, it is also why I ask for pictures.

Not just because I want proof the gifts arrived or that the people are real.  But because I want to reinforce to the open, caring, wonderful hearts here at DGMS that their trust is a GOOD thing, that their faith in what happens on my end is producing results and touching little hearts they, and I, may never have an opportunity to actually meet, but whose lives have forever been made better because we dared to care.

Stroke Of Genius

A friend posted this on Facebook this morning.  Now, I usually ignore the copious videos, most of the quizzes, etc. on FB  (Although I have fallen into the land of Bejeweled and can't get up!)  I'm busy, and usually juggling a million things at once, even at the keyboard.  So I can't explain exactly why I clicked on this one.

Especially since it is 20 minutes in length.

But click, I did.

And for 20 minutes I was enthralled, drawn in, educated, amused, and lifted.

It is the first person story of Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor, a brain specialist.  Her story of her stroke, a neuroanatomist getting the real scoop from the inside out, as it happened to her.  It is not only amazing from a detail standpoint, and she has certainly found a way to draw the humor from what could have been a tragic end, but what she discovered is transcendent.  It applies to every one of us, because it is in every one of us, it is how we are constructed, how we view and interact with the world around us.

Or, how we don't.

Grab some coffee, sit back, and see if you don't come away with a little "Wow" added to your perspective.

Ted Kennedy Passes, But "An Idea Lives On"

Like most of his family members, Ted Kennedy's life contained its share of the exciting, the normally private challenges played out in public, and the scandalous.

But his life was also full of dedication to cause, striving for advancement, and staunch leadership.  He was the embodiment of the words "public servant."

In last month's Newsweek, Kennedy wrote of the current healthcare reform bruhaha:

This is the cause of my life. It is a key reason that I defied my illness last summer to speak at the Democratic convention in Denver--to support Barack Obama, but also to make sure, as I said, "that we will break the old gridlock and guarantee that every American...will have decent, quality health care as a fundamental right and not just a privilege." For four decades I have carried this cause--from the floor of the United States Senate to every part of this country. It has never been merely a question of policy; it goes to the heart of my belief in a just society. Now the issue has more meaning for me--and more urgency--than ever before. But it's always been deeply personal, because the importance of health care has been a recurrent lesson throughout most of my 77 years.

Would that "the cause" of his life be the "idea that lives on" and the one that becomes a reality for millions.

Rest in peace, Lion of the Senate.  May your roar live on.

No Time for Mourning -- In Memoriam: Ted Kennedy

Personal Responsibility Goes Up In Smoke

People are notorious for doing things they know they shouldn't.

From texting while driving to skydiving to supersizing their fries to chain smoking, we indulge our desires and flip the bird to common sense every single day.

Perhaps it's simply how we're hardwired.  Taking risks, no matter the size, is exciting.  It stimulates our senses, and if we are successful - as in, our parachute opens - we wallow in the rush of having danced with death and cheated it in the process.

Why then, when we are so eager to gamble, so willing to eat that second loaded burger while trading on the fact that we may be setting ourselves up for a heart attack by the name of "Whopper"; when we know damn well that jumping out of an airplane is not advocated by our life insurance company; when every common sense synapse in our head is firing staccato fashion and warning us to answer the cell phone when we get to our destination, not while flying down the freeway at 70 mph - why do we do it anyway?

Simple.  We are hedonists.  If it feels good, or makes us happy, do it.  And none of us think bad things can happen to us.  It is also the reason we so easily eschew personal responsibility when things blow up in our faces.

Why didn't someone stop me?

Why didn't someone warn me?

This surely can't be my fault!

Well, yes, yes it can.

Your heart explodes because the only weights you've curled for years are the quarter pounder kind?  Your fault, not McDonald's.

Your relatives have to use a spatula to get your pancaked carcass into the coffin after your chute doesn't deploy?  No one forced you to go up in, much less, jump out of an airplane.

Your lungs finally flip you the bird after years of you turning smoke inhalation into an artform?  Don't hack for me, Argentina.  Lungs should look like beautiful pink uncooked pork chops, not well done steak.

It's that last one that is making headlines again. 

Smoking.  There is not a person among us who doesn't know it's not exactly a great health regimen.  You never hear: exercise three times per week, drink lots of water, eat fruits and vegetables, and light up a pack a day in the recommended guidelines for living a healthy life.

Smoke inhalation is bad.  That's how most people die in house fires.  Their lungs are glued shut long before their bodies are charbroiled.

Still, millions of Americans indulge their craving / addiction daily.  And that's fine.  I mean that.  You're an adult.  You know the risks.  And if you still decide to Flick Your Bic, that's YOUR choice. 

Just don't make it someone else's responsibility when you're reduced to talking through a hole in your throat.

Yesterday a jury in Los Angeles awarded $14 million to the daughter of a woman who had died of lung cancer.  The defendant?  Philip Morris.

Yeah.

$14 million because her mother chose to smoke their product.

Betty Bullock, the deceased, had originally begun pointing her stained finger at PM back in 2001, alleging fraud and product liability.  That jury awarded her $750,000 in damages, $100,000 for pain and suffering, and - are you ready? - $28 BILLION in punitive damages.

$28 BILLION DOLLARS.

For her own bad choices.

Now, a judge came along and later reduced that to $28 MILLION, which of course, Philip Morris appealed.

Betty died in 2003 so her daughter took over banging the drum of It's Someone Else's Fault I'm Stupid! ever since.

The whole argument has been that Betty began smoking as a teenager, back in the day when smoking was glamorized in movies, doctors did commercials for cigarettes, etc.

But here's the thing - cigarettes have always been referred to "cancer sticks" - that's not something new the teens of today came up with.  That goes back to the beginning. 

And even if you started as a teen and then learned that smoking clogs up your lungs, dramatically increases your chance of lung cancer, and dramatically decreases the number of years you'll be around, it's still no one else but you who is sticking that cylinder in your mouth and inhaling its dangerous contents.

It's not the fault of the manufacturers.  It's a personal choice.  A personal choice to START, a personal choice to CONTINUE.

Just because a company makes something does not mean you have to buy it.  Kentucky Fried Chicken is test marketing a "sandwich" of bacon, two cheeses, and some artery clogging sauce between two pieces of fried chicken.  Yes, that's right, screw the bun - the chicken is the bun.

Eating that is no better for you than driving thru a burger chain every day and loading up on fries, soda, and whatever Angus Artery Buster the King is promoting.

The logic and facts are there - these things are loaded with fat and calories, ergo, they are not in your best interests.  But our taste buds don't give a fart in the wind about facts.  And logic takes a flying leap in the face of anything we dunk in hot oil. 

So, we eat it.  A lot of it.  And over a quarter of our national population are classified as obese.

That's a CHOICE.  A bad one, but a choice nonetheless.  We don't have to buy their products.  I have yet to drive past a McDonald's and have someone point an Uzi at my head forcing me to inhale a milkshake or Big Mac.

You know, it's one thing to sue a company if they are clearly negligent.  Say their toys are covered in lead paint, or their blender has defective ball bearings which fly out and remove one of your eyes.  By all means, hold them accountable for selling a product which you bought in good faith yet turned out to be potentially fatal.

But don't go all Erin Brockovich when the pollutants in your body were knowingly put there BY YOU, not some faceless company.

CIGARETTES ARE BAD FOR YOU. 

But there's something even worse.  We suffer from common sense cancer, and a chronic case of finger pointing.