Like so many, sleep does not come easy these days. Be it the dreaded hormone upheaval of menopause, the insomnia induced by personal worries, or the general unrest caused by the world around us, I know I am not alone in staring into the dark for many hours each night.
Out of frustration, I find myself up, wandering around, and then settling down beside my cat to peruse the news, take in human interest stories, play the various games provided by the NYT, and to think about purpose, place, meaning. Mine, yours, ours, theirs.
I routinely stumble into one of the hundreds of horoscope options online - yes, yes, I know, there are 8.1 billion people out there, so even with a rudimentary division of 12, that means I share the readings with 675 million others, but sometimes they come really close the to the mark.
It was around midnight early this past week when I read this one and so much became clear.
Every word resonated. In fact, it hit my heart as an arrow to a bullseye. Life is complicated. Rudy and I are gearing up for another move. Another period of separation. Another abstract set of logistics that I will have to pull together in my mind and then into hardcore reality and plans. And the heart shredding pain of leaving Miss Marlowe in the rearview for longer periods of time. I am well versed in all of the former. The latter? I can hardly think about it before tears begin to threaten. Being so involved in her first year of life has been such an enormous gift. Living ten minutes from her the past six months means I am there not just for Mimi Mondays, but often three or four additional days to lend a hand, put on my playpen socks, and create the most beautiful music there is: her laugh.
On top of the personal, I despair the ongoing turmoil, inequity, brutal violence, and unimaginable death happening in so many places on the other side of the world. I see the humanity and the devastating losses. The tears of parents, love ones, children whose lives are caught in a nightmare from which they cannot awaken. So much of this world is a global Rubik's cube that will seemingly never be solved.
So, yeah, complicated.
Besides my grand daughter's smile, laugh, and antics, I find solace in the seasonal elfing of Yes, Virginia. Thanks to the year round donations of some of you, coupled with the extra funds that came in when collecting for new glasses for Jamie, I have been working the keyboard during naptimes and night times.
My inbox overfloweth with all the emails for the upcoming Black Friday sales, promo codes, coupons. My lists have lists, and my vetting to insure your donations are safely delivered to real families, real children, to effect real change is ongoing. As distressing as are so many of the stories to which I am invited, I am heartened by knowing this amazing community stands at the ready to make this holiday season merrier, brighter than it would be without.
So, that last line in the horoscope above? True. And I feel it to my very core.
"You'll feel less alone. You'll believe, once more, that it's possible to change the world."
I do. And it is. With your help, we can change tiny pieces of this world. And on a planet with 8.1 billion tiny pieces, that is still extraordinary, indeed. Stay tuned for glimpses into the lives you are lifting... and please, send those you know who we may help to my inbox.
Much love and appreciation,
Linda
Please give if you can. Apologize to the pennies for the squeezing they will endure, and then send them this way:
Paypal: [email protected]
Venmo: @Linda-Sharp-29
Zelle: [email protected]
Comments