Don't Get Me Started with Linda Sharp

Adding Insult To Injury

As I wrote earlier today, we know that there is a contingent of folks who are wringing their hands, rending their garments, and shitting their pants all because marriage equality became the law of the land, thus sending them into a paroxysm of oogies. 

It won't affect their personal lives - trust me, it won't.  Those expressing themselves in a style most often seen in zoo settings:  monkeys flinging their poo - need not fear that their mailboxes will suddenly bulge with gay wedding invites.  No one is going to enter their houses of worship and force them at gunpoint into a same sex marriage.  And no amount of marriage equality is going to cheapen their own adulterous affairs, humdrum unions, and third divorces.

But don't let facts get in the way of a good Chicken Little moment or two.

Bryan Fischer, the Pat Robertson of the airwaves, was so overcome with the vapuhs, Miss Scarlett, that his Tweets reflected not only no relation to reality, but added excessive insult to those who actually lived, died, or endured the very real injuries.

Riiiiight, because allowing everyone equal access to the legal union called marriage is SO the same thing as hijacked airplanes, towers falling, thousands of innocent lives lost.

SO. THE. SAME. THING.

Bryan, your morals just need to step off.  They apply only to YOUR life.  So if you think same sex marriage is wrong?  Do not have one.  It is so very simple.  What happened yesterday is the legal reminder that this country is composed of many more people than just your small minded, "family values" crowd.  And that you can no longer hog all the wedding cake.

Comparing equality to the horrendous agony that survivors and families have lived with every moment since that nightmare morning, is reprehensible.  It cheapens the lives of those who perished; it flips a bird to the suffering of those who have only memories to hold; and it reinforces the mindset of religious victimhood that these miscreants have raised to a sickening artform.

But wait.  It gets better in a totally gets worse kind of way.

Yes, he then goes on to Tweet a comparison between sanctioning the union of same sex individuals and ... Pearl Harbor.

Yep, totally the same thing.

He went on to Tweet that the SCOTUS were "Rainbow Jihadists."  Yeah, that.  Makes me envision terrorists with bombs made of Skittles.  Like rogue Oompah Loompas who got fired for getting caught dipping their feet in the chocolate river.

Bryan, you didn't get your way.  We get it.  But the more you people stomp your feet, tear at your hair, and wet your beds - the less we people, who actually understand why  extending equal rights to all is important - CARE.  And quite frankly, the more we laugh at all of you.  Yes, you and your hyperbolic radio show, your Presidential clown car occupants candidates, your FOX News hosts who, at this point, just make shit up because they know they have a captive audience of folks who may know the names of every NASCAR racer, but have zero idea how many judges make up the SCOTUS.  You can tell these people anything as long as it feeds their inner narrative of whiny victimhood, persecution, and idiocy.  Fill their trough with a constant supply of mental slop and they will continue to lap it up, and you will continue to have a job wherein you grift them endlessly.

But here's the thing.  You are becoming obsolete.  Maybe snobsolete is the correct term because you and your cronies have the ass to think you can bend the entire electorate to your way of thinking, worshipping, behaving.

That would be a theocracy, dear Bryan.  And if you would stick your head out of your insulated bubble every now and again, you would see that churches are less and less full, and that theocratic rule is simply not going to happen on our watch.  And there are far more of us than there are of you.

But you never pay attention to that.  That's why Karl Rove is still waiting for Mitt Romney to win Ohio. 

Your ideas, your zealotry, your hubris - they are wasted energy.  And to what end?  You will not win this one.  Or the many more just like it coming down the road. 

Equality is here.  Without towers falling, bombs being dropped, lives being turned to ash, or monuments needing erected over the waters where dead bodies are forever entombed.

But take heart, dearest Bryan.  Even though important changes did take place yesterday, one thing remained solidly the same.  

You're still an asshole.

 

Just Another Brick OUT Of The Wall

"Light of the world, shine on me, love is the answer."  England Dan & John Ford Coley

It is not an understatement to say that millions of people in this country, and millions the world over were basking in the glow of that light yesterday as the Supreme Court ruled on marriage equality and told all 50 states to get on board.

In my house, there were high fives, exclamations of joy, and hope - an overwhelming sense of hope.

None of us are naive enough to think that yesterday's ruling made bigotry, religious zealotry, or profound ignorance vanish, but it did tell that triumvirate to get out the way.  That rights can no longer be denied based on some arbitrary ICKY Meter in their heads.  That the wall they have erected to try to keep basic rights, privileges, and responsibilities to themselves just had another brick knocked out of it.

I watched as my Facebook feed lit up with the vibrancy of hundreds of digital rainbows.  As friends and family expressed their happiness, their surprise, their relief - happiness that something so common sense had been shown to be just that - common sense; surprise that, despite a 5-4 ruling, SCOTUS got it right; and relief that, well, SCOTUS got it right - 5 of them at least.

And then predictably, I watched as the other side of the coin revealed itself in the ugly, heinous, offensive posts of bratty children who didn't get their way.

Yes, bratty children.  The comments and expressions of hate poured forth from adults like a tantrum from a 3 year old who had just been cut off from another helping of Goldfish crackers or another viewing of Dora the Explorer.

The rending of garments, the shitting of pants, the misappropriation of Bible verses, and the outrage with the intensity of a thousand suns was as laughable as it was sad.

And I have no problem admitting I have, and continue to today, enjoyed every bit of it.

Because it is stupid.  And pointless.  And mean.  And when stupid, pointless mean bullies get knocked on their asses, it is satisfying.

The ending paragraph of the opinion written by Justice Kennedy states:  

"No union is more profound than marriage, for it embodies the highest ideals of love, fidelity, devotion, sacrifice, and family. In forming a marital union, two people become something greater than once they were. As some of the petitioners in these cases demonstrate, marriage embodies a love that may endure even past death. It would misunderstand these men and women to say they disrespect the idea of marriage. Their plea is that they do respect it, respect it so deeply that they seek to find its fulfillment for themselves. Their hope is not to be condemned to live in loneliness, excluded from one of  civilization’s oldest institutions. They ask for equal dignity in the eyes of the law. The Constitution grants them that right. The judgement of the Court of Appeals for the Sixth Circuit is reversed.   It is so ordered."

The simple truths contained in those words should be enough to get it through the thickest of heads, the most warped of religious interpretations, the most willfully belligerent of arguments, that this is about love.  It is about allowing all to enter into a legally sanctioned union born of that love.  It is about the protections, privileges, and benefits hetero couples have always taken for granted.

It should be enough.  Love is love.  That concept is pretty simple.  Sadly, instead of leading their flocks to enlightenment, the likes of Cruz, Walker, Rubio, Santorum, Huckabee et al, have taken to their BULLY pulpits to embolden their disciples, to reinforce their sense of victimhood, to wage war on LOVE.

Walker calls the ruling a "grave mistake."  Well, I'll go with the grave reference and help dig the hole in which his hyperbole can go rot.

Huckabee, after referring to the SCOTUS as "an imperial court" (funny how it's only imperial when they don't get their way) added that “The Supreme Court can no more repeal the laws of nature and nature’s God on marriage than it can the laws of gravity." 

Huck - sell it somewhere else.  The human sexuality spectrum - NATURE - exists, like it or not.  And if you believe in a God who created everything and everyone, you are treading on thin ice by continually condemning a huge swath of His children.  And MARRIAGE is a legal construct, not a biblical one.  A marriage is not legal until the couple has a piece of paper from the government acknowledging the union.  No one needs your churches, pews full of viewers, rambling Psalms, or gaudy receptions to be married.  You can do ALL of that, but without a license, you have two dressed up people heading off into the sunset to live in your version of sin.

Basically, God has zero to do with marriage.  Unless He is invited to the party.

Santorum, who obviously has visions of sky dragons being sent from on high to smite us all, rambled, "The stakes are too high and the issue too important to simply cede the will of the people to five unaccountable justices.”

Pssst, Rick, like it or not, every poll, study, survey taken indicates the will of the people - the majority - support marriage equality.  Just because you are not one of them, doesn't make the numbers disappear.  What happened yesterday reflects the will of the people.  That you feel oogy inside has zero bearing on equal rights.

Oh, and that statement that began with, "As President, I will...," well, I was laughing too hard to get through all of it. Rick, pay attention:  YOU. WILL. NEVER. BE. PRESIDENT.  Of Rotary Club, maybe.  Sweater Vest Club For Men?  Definitely.  But "of the United States"?  HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...

And while I am laughing at delusions, Rick Perry said, from behind his latest lenses from Warby Parker, “as president, I would appoint strict Constitutional conservatives who will apply the law as written.”

So basically the answer is to stock the fishpond with the kind of fish you like, Rick?  Sorry, but the conservatives currently on the court got their robed asses handed to them by the ones who actually understand that the sky is not falling and that every citizen is guaranteed "liberty and justice for ALL."

Oh, and, YOU. WILL. NEVER. BE. PRESIDENT.

But Rafael Cruz wins the prize for most hubris, hyperbole, and gall, by uttering that - between SCOTUS insuring millions would not lose their still new protections under the Affordable Care Act, and marriage equality being ushered in - these were the "darkest 24 hours in the nation’s history.” 

Really, Raf?  Really?  Not the wholesale slaughter of Native Americans who dared to be on our land before we got here?  Not the soulless marginalization of an entire group of people ripped from their homes, thrown on boats, and sold into slavery?  Not the Civil War, not 9/11?  This?  Insurance and equality?

Yep, dark days indeed.  I was surprised to see the sun actually have the strength to rise this morning, so heavy is the atmosphere, so laden with the tears of conservative idiocy.

Oh, and YOU. WILL. NEVER. BE. PRESIDENT. EITHER.

Look, we are all aware that, whether based on religious upbringing, blatant bigotry, or simple stupidity, a lot of people got their asses in knots yesterday.  A lot of people are now convinced that the sky will fall on us, that the end times are here, that we are officially a forsaken nation.  

They are wrong.  They simply got told that.  In no uncertain terms.  They were put on legal notice that their choices of faith, figments of imagination, and sense of supremacy are not the legal standards by which the electorate would continue to be subjected.

They were told that love is love is love is love.

And you know what?  They don't have to "get it," understand it, accept it, or participate in it.  That's the beauty of things.  But they no longer get to impose their personal ICKY Meter on everyone else.

And those of us who do get it?  Those of us in the majority who understand that marriage should be available to all, and that the marriage of two men won't sully the sanctity of our hetero union?  We are cheering, we are happy, we are standing strong and proud that our country is catching up.

We see this - a loving, amazing couple from Dallas, ages 82 and 85, who have waited over 50 years to be able to legally and openly commit to one another - and we smile.  We don't see sin, we see sun.  We don't see gross, we see glee.  We don't see the end of the world, we see the beginning.

We see LOVE.  The same love we share with our spouses.  The same desire to express that love, to insure our husband or wife is protected, can visit us on our deathbeds.

Simple.  Clean.  Love.

Hate has never been the answer to anything.  But love?  Love is the answer, and today we continue to celebrate it no longer being in question.  It is so ordered.

"Shine on us all, set us free..."

Losing Their Damned Minds

Yes, if it seems I am beating a particular drum harder lately, I am.  I have friends and loved ones sprinkled like beautiful confetti over all areas of the human sexuality spectrum and I am growing increasingly weary of having to constantly worry about their well being in the face of so many asshatted attackers - especially the ones who profess to be so attached to God.

Whether it is politicians pandering for votes, or preachers grifting for donations, it is getting beyond tiresome.

Today's I-Just-Cannot-Mind-My-Own-Fucking-Business winner is Texas pastor Rick Scarborough.

In a recent National Emergency Coalition conference call...

Wait.  Pause.

National Emergency Coalition.  Understand they do not consider earthquakes, tornadoes, floods as emergencies.  No, true emergencies, as highlighted in their weekly conference calls, are icky things like GAY MARRIAGE (insert scary drums and Game of Thrones music), TRANSGENDER bathroom issues (insert Jaws theme and mental picture of Caitlyn Jenner's dorsal fin cutting through the rainbow hued waters), and MUSLIMS being allowed to even breathe the air of freedom in this country (insert panicked stupid Americans and Mayberry music).

But back to the recent conference call featuring Rick Scarborough.  In it he waxed crapsodic, cautioning about impending marriage equality, "We are not going to bow, we are not going to bend, and if necessary, we will burn.”

Because two people in love, who make you feel icky inside, might finally be afforded the full meaning behind "liberty and justice for all"?

Fine.  Burn.  Set your ridiculous ass on fire.  I'll provide the gas and matches to expedite the matter.  Take you and your hatred masquerading as religion to the grave.  In fact, get all your loser religious buddies who think like you to line up beside you and we'll watch you all go down like flaming dominoes.

YOU WON'T BE MISSED.

I really want to know why it is so hard for these idiots to just mind their own fucking business? 

What do they hope to gain by grandstanding their hatred, their warped interpretations of the scriptures?

Rhetorical question - we all know the answer.  $$$$$  Those fine suits and Rolex watches don't come cheap, and you know God wants His reps to look gooooooooood.

Barf.

Do you know what LGBT folks want?  They want to live in peace.  They want a roof over their heads, food in their bellies, love, and equal rights.  Pretty simple.  They are not looking to come to your doorstep, ring the bell, and proselytize.  No, that act is pretty much licensed by some religious people already.  They are not going to stage a gay orgy on the alter of your church.  They are not going to molest your children in the bathroom.

They just want you to leave them the fuck alone.

But until that sinks in, I happily join them in helping the fight to keep people like Scarborough shitting themselves blind in panic over their imaginary "emergencies."

Because Rick, I'll let you in on something... Your real problem isn't the LGBT community.  It's the enormous number of supporters like me standing with them.

Relentlessly Stupid

It seems not a day, hell, an hour, goes by without some raging homophobe rising to the top of the news stream like so much badly curdled cream.  But in the case of these cowards, it is more like badly curdled brains.

Today's factose intolerant candidate is found in a story out of Baltimore, Maryland.

See this?  Pretty, isn't it?

Think again.

So disgusted and icked out by this display of multi colored mason jar solar lights - which incidentally spell out "OHANA" (family) and "LOVE" - yet another one of those wonderful representatives of Christianity left this precious missive on the door of the home:

"Relentlessly gay."

Because rainbow.

Point of order, you religiously mushbrained twat - I do believe it is your own book of folk tales - Genesis 9:13 - which reads:  I have set my rainbow in the clouds, and it will be the sign of the covenant between me and the earth.

That would be God offering that multicolored wonder, correct?

So it would seem to me the displaying of a rainbow is a show of respect for God, while your demands and threats would be a display of disrespect towards the Big Guy.

Look, I don't follow your Bible.  I don't.  I view it as what it actually is.  A tome of writings from the Bronze Age when we humans did not know where the sun went at night.  It has been warped, rewritten, re-rewritten, bastardized, translated, re-translated, added to, and taken from since its first printing.  But if you want to hide behind it adhere to it, then shouldn't you at least know what it says?

Threatening your neighbor (in such a cowardly way, I might add) is far from Godly.  And as far as your poor children being exposed to pretty glass jars that spell out LOVE and OHANA?  Come on now, Stitch taught everyone what Ohana meant a long time ago.  How is the message of Love & Family a bad one for your kids?

Oh, wait - stupid me - love and family are only for you God fearin', church goin', hetero types, amiright?

Those who are LGBT or who support equal rights are heathenistic, hellbound, Satanic perverts.  Do I have that talking point right?

The owner of the home in question, Julie Baker, like so many of us who don't buy into your narrow views and definitions, is laughing at you.  In fact, she decided to amp up the rainbow wattage and started a Go Fund Me campaign to allow people to help her employ the red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, and violet as much as possible.

Needless to say...  I need more rainbows... Many, many more rainbows….

So, I am starting this fundraiser so I can work to make my Home even More "relentlessly gay"  If we go high enough, I will see if I can get a Rainbow Roof!

Because my invisible relentlessly gay rainbow dragon should live up there in style!

Put simply, I am a widow and the mother of four children, my youngest in high school and I WILL NOT Relent to Hatred. Instead, I will battle it with whimsy and beauty and laughter and love, wrapped around my home, yard and family!!!

Thanks for your relentlessly gay support!

Relentlessly!!!

As of this writing the fund is up to $20,571.

I hope she puts up rainbow siding, a rainbow brick driveway, flags, chairs, field turf, flowers, a roof of rainbow hued shingles, and has Adam Lambert performing in the front yard every night.

She is right.  Relenting to hate is not the answer.  Equal rights will not hurt that letter writer any more than he/she is already damaged.  And rainbows will not stop appearing in the sky just because Christians now fear their association with equality.

Rainbows are beautiful.  Equality is beautiful.  And both will appear after the storm.  So rage on haters.  Hurl your hateful hail of words, try to drown us out with your torrential stupidity, even throw a tornado of terror if you must. 

That equality rainbow will appear.  Because you did get one thing right - we are relentless.

Waking Up This Mourning

Nine people.  Nine people in a church.  Nine people in a church for a Bible study.  Nine people in a church for a Bible study are dead this mourning.  <-- No, that is not a typo.  As the world rises today, the decent ones among us are mourning this morning.

Last night, while peacefully gathered for a weekly Bible study, a waste of oxygen identified as Dylann Roof entered the Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church in Charleston, South Carolina.  According to survivors, he sat there for nearly an hour before opening fire and then reloading five times.  One of the victims, State Senator and Reverend Clementa Pinckney, attempted to talk to him, to talk him out of what he was doing.

According to witnesses, his reply was, "I have to do it. You rape our women and you're taking over our country."

When Dylann Roof walked back out with his hate, he left carnage in his wake. 

According to his Uncle who recognized him from security cameras, Roof was gifted with a gun just two months ago when he turned 21.

While comment boards heat up with right vs left rhetoric, blame gaming, heinous apologists, prayers, and terminology word play - none of the anger, denial, racism, or attempts at common sense will erase the reality that nine people had their lives taken last night by hate.

And as we repeatedly see, when hate is armed, it is deadly.

His statement about "taking over our country"?  The ignorance is profound.  Standing up and refusing to be marginalized, cast aside, thought of as less is an ongoing battle.  It did not stop when the Emancipation Proclamation came down.  It did not lessen when Martin Luther King, Jr. marched and moved hearts and minds with his powerful words.  Racism and bigotry did not evaporate when we elected a half black President.  TWICE.

If anything, those predisposed by upbringing and brainwashing; by personal bias and ignorance; those whose hatred has been fomented by slanted media for eight years - those people have only been emboldened.  Emboldened through a campaign of carefully stoked fear, misinformation, and the knowledge that they are not alone in their bunker mentality.

These people are not big thinkers.  They are not nuanced thinkers.  They are bumper sticker thinkers.  And they are always on the look out for someone on whom to blame their particular shitty lot in life.

It cannot ever be their choices.  Their lack of intellectual curiosity.  Their lifestyles.  No, It is someone else's fault.  Always. 

Black people, women, gays, Muslims - the list is long and convenient.  Pick one and point so as to not have to own responsibility for your own carefully tended stupidity garden.

As for the "you rape our women" nugget?  Dylann, Dylann, Dylann - where even to start?  Rape is not the sole provance of the black man.  Rape belongs to an entire subset of non-humanity who think nothing about taking what they want, and meting out unthinkable violence against women.  

Rape is colorblind in both perpetrator and victim.

Given Dylann's own history of criminal activity - most recently on drug charges - I find it exhaustingly laughable that he would throw a pebble, let alone a stone.

This country has a problem.  A HUGE problem.  When this type of mentality is allowed to not only live, but flourish, the end result is only going to be continued carnage like we saw last night.  As long as babies are born and raised to hate by these type of people, the cycle will not end. 

And as long as young white men get a pass when they mete out these horrific murders - immediately being protected with words like "mentally ill" and "misguided" while young black people at a pool party are tagged as "thugs" and "not a saint" - the imbalance will continue to churn out Dylann Roofs.

And we will continue to wake up to another mourning and another mourning and another mourning.

While I have been typing, police have tracked and taken this cowardly piece of shit into custody.

His capture will not bring back the innocent lives taken.  It will not erase this hate crime.  It will not make this less of a terror attack.

But as the days move forward and more details about this hateful, dark hearted, ignorant waste are revealed, I hope people are paying attention.  Paying attention to the ones who will be cheering his actions.  Paying attention on comment boards as apologists do what they do behind the safety of their keyboards. 

We cannot bring life back to the dead.  But we can bring renewed life to the march to eradicate this diseased, cancerous, deadly mindset from our society.

What Kind Of Parent Will You Be?

For years I have written pieces in support of equality for all, regardless of their place on the gender spectrum.  That no one's sexuality should be the determining factor in one's ability to participate fully in "in liberty and justice for all" in this country of ours.  That if two people are in love, who is to tell them they cannot be?

But lately, as the national conversations surrounding the letters LGBT, marriage equality, and same sex adoption have ratcheted up, I find myself thinking more and more about the young people who will truly be affected in the years to come.

Will they come out into a land where they ARE viewed as equal?  Will they freely walk an aisle to their same sex mate in every state, with that marriage being recognized in every state?  Will a trans child grow into an society that insures the suicide attempt rate continues to fall?

For these young people, some so young right now that they are not yet aware that they are these young people, their parents are the ground zero in their first step.

Or rather their parents should be.

Which brings me to the question.  To all of you who are parents, and to all of you who aspire to someday be granted the privilege:  What kind of parent are you?  What kind of parent will you be?

If your kneejerk response is, "Well, no child of mine will ever dare be gay/lesbian/trans!" then you immediately fail this test because you do not understand this is beyond your control and has absolutely zero to do with you.

I don't care how much religion in which you steep your child; how much vocalized bigotry you espouse under your roof; how much fear you may try to bring to bear - if your child falls somewhere on the spectrum besides hetero, THEY JUST DO.

So, when that day comes - and it will come to many of you - what will you do?

As your child stands in front of you, on the precipice of an emotional cliff with no safety net, bravely attempting to share their essential truth with you, will you be their hope and harness?  Or will you be their horror?

Will your ego, your religion, your upbringing, your preconceived notions push your child off that cliff?

Again, it's an honest question because none of us becomes a parent knowing who our children are.  Yes, we can raise them, get to know their personalities, their likes, dislikes, talents, and tantrums.  We can groom them - influencing taste buds, expanding musical horizons, instructing them in a chosen faith - but we do not get to choose who they are.  We do not get to choose their hair color, eye color, which hand they write with, if they are artistic, musical, athletic.  Why would we deign to think we get to choose their heart, their mind, their soul, their inner being?

So what kind of parent will you be?

Will you reach out and immediately embrace your child or recoil?  Will you be caught up in your own thoughts of how this affects you?  Will you admit your ignorance, but vow to educate yourself, or will you wallow in your arrogance?  Will you choose the love you have had for your child through the years, or retreat to a hate you have always nurtured towards "those people"?

And keep in mind, you will only get one shot to get your response right - the moment the words are hanging fearfully in the air between your child's mouth and your ears.  How you respond is what they will feel and remember forever.  Sure, they may allow you some rope, and you may come around, but your initial response will leave a mark.  Because you will have inflicted a memory, and those are wounds that stay.

If you find yourself in that moment, what should you feel?  Flattered, appreciated, important, vital, and fearful.

Flattered - that your child is doing the hardest thing a child can do - open up.  No matter how great is your relationship with your child, they will still be afraid.  Afraid of rejection, afraid of disappointing you.

Appreciation - that your child is standing in front of you baring their soul.  

Important - yes, important because you are being trusted more than ever in that moment.

Vital - because your child is where they should be, in front of you.  This moment is what every moment, day, week, month, and year before should have been shaping you as - their safe place.

And finally, fearful - yes, you should be afraid.  This society is making strides, but there are still swaths of people - large swaths - who derive some backass sense of superiority by virtue of their hetero-ness.  Which is just as lame as those who derive some idiotic superiority over having been born white.  And they take pleasure in hurting those unlike themselves.

I can promise you that your child will be fearful.  Again, no matter how strong you consider your relationship with them to be, by the time they stand in front of you, they have a back up plan formulated.  And probably not just one.  Probably several back-up plans, friends to run to, other parents they trust, couches they may sleep on, where they will go.

When they stand in front of you, all they want, all they are desperately hoping to find, is the love that kept them alive as a baby, nurtured them as a toddler, supported them as a young child.  To find that love still standing strong, ready to be their harbor from the storms, to be their strength as they move forward, to be the one love they can fall asleep certain will never leave them stranded.

The streets are littered with homeless LGBT teens.  Young people disowned, kicked out, cut off, cast aside like so much trash.  Young people whose greatest sin was to articulate who they are.  Young people who found horror, not hope.  Condemnation, not calm. 

Ask yourself.  Now.  And continue to ask yourself as your children grow. 

What kind of parent will you be?  For your child's sake, I hope it's the kind that they - and every single child out there - deserve.

Status Update: You're Fired

Professionals have long cautioned parents of the dangers of the internet.  We are warned to supervise where our children surf, with whom they interact, and to warn against sharing any personal information.

We monitor their social feeds, have access to their passwords, and if necessary, pull back the privilege of online access in order to teach a lesson.  If they are teens and aspire to play a sport in college, we make sure they wipe their social streams as clean as possible.

We do what we can to protect kids from themselves.

Lately, however, it would appear it's the adults who need the lessons on caution, safety, how the "internets" actually operate.  Because week after week, another adult - be it parent, professional, or politician steps in a quagmire of their own idiocy and making.

Meet today's "Huh?  Whut?  How?" winner (see runner-up below), elementary school teacher, Karen Fitzgibbons, of Texas.

Ms. Fitzgibbons, as is her right, had an opinion on the video and circumstances surrounding the McKinney pool party gone awry.  As is also her right, she took to the internet to share her thoughts.

On Facebook she posted:

How precious.  A teacher.  A molder of young minds.  An educator who has every color of child come through her classroom each year, waxing crapsodic for ye good olde days of segregation.

And you've got to love the "I'm not racist" hashtag.  Of course not, Karen. 

Hint:  when you hear the words "I'm not racist," prepare yourself for some of the most racist shit you have ever heard come out of the not racist's mouth.

I would love one of these "not racists" to explain to me exactly who they think are racists.

Karen, of course, was shocked when her words began to heat the water in which she felt so comfy whilst imparting them.  So she deleted them.  Problem solved, right?

Sorry, Einstein.

When will people learn that all it takes is a Right click > Save to insure their photos live forever, and a one second screenshot to insure their words may be held against them in the court of public opinion?  And in their workplace.

Which is what happened. 

Despite her deletion, a screenshot of her screed was shown to her employer.  A spokesperson for the Frenship school district pointed the reporter to this section of their policies:

“If an employee’s use of electronic media interferes with the employee’s ability to effectively perform his or her job duties, the employee is subject to disciplinary action, up to and including termination of employment.”

As of today, Ms. Fitzgibbons is no longer a molder of young minds (or the mold in the young minds) at Bennett Elementary School.

Of course, she and her equally uneducated supporters are now beginning to bang the Freedom of Speech drums.

Sorry, kids, but she had her free speech.  No one took away her free speech.  She was not thrown in jail for her bigoted Facebook rant.  She is not on a one-way express to Siberia to bust rocks till Jesus comes home.

She can continue to expound all she wants about black people.  But here's the cool thing about free speech!  Those of us with morals, decency, and a distaste for revisiting a time when they could not even drink out of the same water fountains CAN FREE SPEECH RIGHT BACK AT HER.

Your right to spew your words on Twitter, Facebook, Snapchat, Tumblr, or in person does not protect you from the consequences of your words.

Look, we know you're out there.  We hear you in the store.  We have to listen to you on the sidelines.  We see your disgusting bumper stickers.  We drive by and shake our heads as you proudly hoist a Confederate flag.  We know you're proud of your whiteness. 

But we do not have to tolerate you in the classrooms, principal's offices, etc when you publicly out yourself for the racist sewage that you are.

I wrote last night about how many people go to bed at night not realizing they will wake up and be known on the other side of the planet.  And how it is not usually for winning the lottery or curing cancer.  It is an infamy of their own stupid making and this is a perfect example. 

Given how frequently this exact scenario plays out, I have very little (read: ZERO) sympathy for any adult who posts something heinous, offensive, and/or racist, and then is *shocked* to find their words can be held against them not only in the court of public opinion, but used as a basis for firing.  Yes, your online behavior is a direct reflection on your employer when it is discovered and dragged into the spotlight to be sanitized by publicity.

We always worry about insuring our children take care online, but maybe someone really needs to teach a class to you adolts (yes, adults + dolts) about how the internet actually works.

(Don't worry, the syllabus won't waste time on how to open a GoFundMe page.  These people seem to have that one down really well.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Our "Huh? Whut? How?" runner-up is Alberto Iber, former principal of North Miami Senior High.  Yes, former.  He, too, was held accountable and shown the door after he posted his support of Eric Casebolt's behavior.  "I commend him for his actions."  Seems his school district doesn't want a principal who thinks it's cool to brandish a gun at a bunch of bathing suited teenagers. 

Hell, even Casebolt has apologized for his behavior.

Divorced From Reality

It's been coming on stronger and stronger for years now.  Making strides legally state to state, around the world, and societally in opinion polls.

Gay Marriage.

The simple extension to gay couples of the legal contract enjoyed by heteros.

That's it.  That's all.  No sinister agenda to molest your children.  No underlying plot to sully the sanctity of that impressive 40%-50% hetero divorce rate.  No devious subterfuge to close churches, bakeries, photography studios.

Just a legal contract issued by the government that links one person to another, thus granting protections and responsibilities alike.

YES, a legal contract.

That part seems to constantly escape the religious set who grandstand against marriage equality.  Marriage is a contract, a license.  A piece of paper applied for and granted by the state.

I don't care how many flowers you drape over the alter, how many flower girls and bridesmaids you stuff into unflattering dresses, or how many psalms are read at the pulpit.  Your church ceremony does not make you legally married.  It takes that piece of paper from the government, and someone ordained - a judge, a minister, a county clerk, your neighbor, ME - to legally join you together.

Just as it's a legal process to dismantle a marriage.  Paperwork, attorneys, judges.

Yet, as simple as is the request, there are still crowds of folk who refuse to allow that two people they deem icky should be allowed in.

Politicians stake their re-elections on grandstanding against marriage equality.  Every presidential wannabe on the right will go chapter and bible verse about how they will be Super Hetero!, protecting us all from the heathen homo hordes.

It's stupid. 

Yet sometimes, stupid is all people have going for them, so they double down.

Or in this case, they double down under.

The latest couple to take to the media with their plan to foil equality are these darlings:

Meet Nick and Sarah Jensen of Australia.

So devout are they in their belief that "Marriage is the union of a man and a woman before a community in the sight of God," they are prepared to get divorced should Australia make it legal for two people of the same gender to marry.

Yeah, let that sink in for a moment.  If Bob and Ted, or Carol and Alice can get married because they are in love, Nick and Sarah will get divorced.

Stick with me while I try to untangle the knot of their thinking.

Nick believes that when they got married, they did so under the then rules of Australia that marriage was only between a man and a woman.  They agreed with those rules.  But if the rules change to allow the icky people in to do what they do with each other (because, let's be honest, these people somehow only ever hyperfocus on that) then that makes their marriage contract "null and void."

OK, first let me just say directly to Nick and Sarah:  NO ONE CARES.

The world chimes did not ring out the day you two joined up, so if you think you divorcing is somehow history making in some emotional Hiroshima way?  You think way too much of yourselves.

No one cared when you got married.  Understand?  Sure, maybe your families got together and bought you a gravy boat and ate some cake, but beyond that?  Just another day on the calendar.

Which is all gay people are asking for.  Just another day on the calendar that only matters to them and the folks buying them a gravy boat and eating cake.

This kicking, screaming, rending of garments, shitting of pants grandstanding that is going on is shameful. 

We have had this debate before.  Lunch counters, bus seats, water fountains, schools.  Ring a bell?  And do not tell me that your beliefs and racism are different.  They aren't.  You are just the new generation of bigots.

Hiding behind "religious liberty" was the tactic back then, too.

You are hellbent on denying to others the rights you enjoy, based on your belief that you are better than them because "X."  "X" then was skin color.  "X" today is sexuality.

And you are every bit as wrong, hateful, stubborn, and willfully bigoted as were the folks who clung to segregation for dear life back then.

The world is changing and you don't like it.  Fine.  You don't have to.  There are still plenty of people keeping racism alive and unwell in this country of ours, and around the world.  But your personal bigotry about marriage cannot be used as a cudgel to beat back equal rights from being extended to others.  A law will not change your mind.  What a law does is simply remind you that YOUR mind is not the deciding factor in the rights of others.

Ireland, a solidly Catholic country, just legalized gay marriage.  Our Supreme Court will be ruling on it shortly for this country. 

I promise you, gay marriage will not kill hetero marriage.  You know why?  Because there will always be heteros.  Gay marriage will not mean you have to hide your children.  If that is really your concern?  That LGBT people are some pedophilic threats?  Two words:  Josh Duggar.

Like the issue of transgender that has been brought to the fore recently by Caitlyn Jenner, you don't have to like it.  You don't have to approve, support, understand, or participate.  But what you also don't get to do is stand in the way of those who do.

I know you think that the world is going to end if gay marriage becomes nationally legal in these United States.  But like the Jensens, you are simply divorced from reality.

 

Those marriages will not rock your world, touch your world, alter your world.

They really will be just another day on the calendar, and the only people who will truly feel the impact are the couples saying "I do."

Oh, and the gravy boat companies who will need to amp up production.

We Are All Big Brother

In his novel, 1984, George Orwell wrote of a society in which every citizen was constantly under surveillance.  No one could move, eat, think, breathe without Big Brother watching.  Always watching.

It was a compelling and titillating scenario that made for fun sci-fi reading when it was published in 1949,  after all, who truly believed a day would come when we would all have computers in our homes, let alone camera/video/computers in our pockets, right?

Yet here we are.  2015.  And while names like Edward Snowden and laws like The Patriot Act float around to remind us that we can be surveilled at any time, the actual ever present surveillors happen to be society.

We are Big Brother.

Think about it.  At any time of the day, someone is capable of snapping our photo, or recording our behavior.  How many people go to bed tonight not knowing that they may very well be a name gone viral tomorrow?

Did Eric Casebolt, the officer in the McKinney Pool Party debacle wake up last Friday morning thinking he would barrel roll into history and out of a job within the course of a viral upload?

Of course not.

Yet as much as some people want to disparage the ever present recording eye we all carry, it does have value.  When now ex-officer, Eric Slager, in South Carolina shot a man in the back, killing him, and then falsified his call-in and report?  There just happened to be, unbeknownst to Slager, someone with a smartphone catching his stupid murderous rage.

Slager has now been indicted and will stand trial.

A fight breaks out in a Walmart - a fight in which a 6 year old boy is encouraged by his trash mother to punch the other woman in the head - all caught on video.  Will any legal ramifications come of it?  Who knows, but if it does, there will be no disputing what went down.

Yes, we are guilty of photographing and Insta-boring our friends with our buffet choices.  Selfies are the crack of the teen social street corner.  We secretly photograph uncouth behavior on airplanes, hilariously questionable attire in Walmart, random strangers who catch our eye, and bratty outbursts in restaurants.

And then we rush to upload and share the curious, inane, or boorish with our "friends."

Some things go viral overnight.  Sorry, but if I have to see one more share of the tyke outdancing her buddies to R-E-S-P-E-C-T?  Yes, I agree, she will probably be on Ellen within a week.  Let it go, Elsa.

We share promposals, graduations, baby births, celebrations, reunions, happiness, sadness, tears and laughter.  All awesome, and I do love how I get a window into the lives of people I admire but may never actually meet in person.

But that same lovely cybersword that cuts the miles into smiles, connecting us all, does cut both ways.

It captures the awful, the unthinkable, the moments that break our hearts, move us to action, embarrass us, enrage us.

And yes, I am defending that slice of the sword tonight. 

Because it can hold people accountable when they think they are going to get away with something.  It can make people think twice before they act a certain way - because we see repeatedly, almost daily - that someone is watching, snapping, quietly recording.  And in the space of a few minutes of bad judgement, folks in Australia may know your name by morning.

Not just from security cameras installed by stores, or in parking lots, but by her, him, them, you, me.

We are all Big Brother.  And if the presence of an estimated 2 billion smartphones worldwide causes us all to stop, take a breath, and then act or not act at all; if all those fish eyed lenses catch even 1 more criminal who would have otherwise gotten away?

Well, I imagine even old G. Orwell would say there is an upside.

Think before you act.  And for God's sake, keep your shoes on and your legs down the next time you are on an airplane.  I'm watching.

Cell Hell

My best friends almost died yesterday.

That is not a dramatic declaration for the sake of getting your attention.  That is not hyperbole to make a point.

I have seen the pictures.  (See below) I have been given the details of the aftermath and the injuries they sustained.

They almost died.  In fact, no one is more surprised than they are that they are still among the living this morning.

On what was one of the most exciting, anticipated mornings of their lives - they were on their way to watch their oldest daughter graduate - they were hit head on by a van.

A driverless van.

At least that is how my friend said it looked as they watched in terror as a driverless van barreled towards them at 55 mph.

They were stopped, no where to move, no time to get out of the way.

They were hit, pushed back 30 feet into a vehicle that was still driving towards their rear.  They were then hit again by another vehicle attempting to avoid this chain reaction.

A driverless van.

OK, yes, technically there was a driver IN the van, but at the time of the collision he was nowhere to be seen as he had dropped his cell phone and was groping the floor to retrieve it.

There is nothing, NOTHING taking place on your phone while you are driving that is more important than the fact that YOU ARE DRIVING.

No call.  No text message.  No need to change the song on your playlist.  And if it falls to the floor - LEAVE IT.  The world around you actually gets exponentially safer when it is out of your reach because you cannot be distracted by it lighting up.

I have long told my daughters that it doesn't matter how safe they are when they drive, they have to drive for every other self involved risk taker out there with them.

Please - put it away.  Leave it in your purse.  Stash it in the glovebox.  Throw it on the backseat.  It simply is not worth your life, or the lives you are playing with, to have it in your hand distracting you while you drive.

My friends missed their child's graduation yesterday, but in the grand scheme of what happened, they - and all of us who love them - could be missing so much more today.