This Burns Me Up

Human beings are animals. Which means, like our less evolved four legged friends, we are made up of baser instincts, natural reflexes, fight or flight reactions, and a tendancy to bite someone’s head off if they rub our fur the wrong direction.

Sure, we can do quantum physics, solve the Da Vinci code, and have learned that The Secret to success lies in simply willing the universe to drop a new Mercedes, a laundry bag full of cash, and Brad Pitt onto our doorsteps. According to the highly touted, Oprah blessed tome, if you will it, it will come.

But, apparently, sometimes wishing won’t make it so. Sometimes all the positive outlook in the world won’t resolve a completely negative situation. And sometimes, a person has to become actively involved in correcting what they perceive to be wrong in their lives.

That’s when our animalistic side tends to take over.

Take relationships, for instance. We all know that the amount a person purrs in the beginning of a relationship is ultimately in direct proportion to the amount of growling we do when a hook up begins to go sour. We rant. We tear things up. We pace, we pounce, we pee on the rug and chew on the furniture.

OK, ok – maybe not that last one, but you get the picture. Hurt feelings, betrayed trust, broken dreams – they are all perfectly capable of pushing us all but one step away from peeing on the rug.

Most of us, however, settle for changing the locks, throwing the belongings of the offender out on the front lawn, and contacting the divorce lawyer.

But there are others, who are obviously closer to their animal instincts, yet somehow insanely creative in their resolution strategies.

Meet Rosanita Nery dos Santos, 52, of Sao Paulo, Brazil. A woman who must fancy herself a good cook, but who will never appear on an episode of Top Chef with her ... ahem ... recipe.

You see, Rosarita had it up-to-here with her spouse, and what is being reported by relatives as "many years of humiliation from her husband."

So she fried his ass.

Literally.

She drugged him. She stabbed him. She chopped him into 100+ pieces. Then she turned on the stove, prepared the pans (Cooking tip: hot pan, cold oil – food won’t stick), and both boiled and fried his remains. She then put them into a big garbage bag and hid them under the stairs for two years.

Of course, she tells authorities that masked assailants entered her house, killed her husband and then forced her to cut up the body and fry it because that would prevent the stench of a decomposing body from alerting neighbors.

Um. Ye-ah.

Most masked assailants take the time to break out The Joy of Cooking book in order to hide their transgressions.

Rosarita is currently in jail, awaiting trial, the bag of Kentucky Fried Husband discovered after an anonymous tip was phoned in to police.

Forgive me, but I just have to go one logical mental step further...

Even in my refrigerator, a box of cooked Chinese take-out begins to fester and smell like ass after two weeks hidden in the back. And leftover grilled steak, thrown into the big blue garbage can smells like a herd of dead cattle after three days. I simply cannot believe that a bag of cooked person, regardless of the spices used in the process, didn’t reek after just a few days.

But I digress...(and hork up a tad.)

Anyway, when I read about this yesterday, my initial thought was, "Wow. She must have been pissed off." But I also thought, "You don’t read about this kind of domestic dispute everyday. This is unique."

But, oh, how 24 hours can prove a person wrong.

This morning’s news headline out Houston, Texas?

Sheriff: Student murdered, burned on patio grill

I’m not kidding.

Yes, just a couple hours drive from me (Texas does everything big – I am so proud to live here.), a19 year old student at Texas A&M was the victim of her ex-boyfriend’s Lion King-like rage when he discovered she had begun a new relationship – and he wasn’t in it.

Timothy Wayne Shepard, 27, confessed to authorities that he strangled Tynesha Stewart, then dismembered her, and over the course of two days disposed of her via his grill.

Residents of the apartment complex have told authorities they noticed both thick black clouds of smoke and an acrid smell coming from the two grills on his porch, but he told nosey neighbors he was cooking for a wedding. At one point the flames from the grills were dangerously close to the roof over his balcony and a neighbor called 911, however, by the time the fire department arrived, the flames were under control and they left.

That their loved one was killed to begin with? As a parent, I cannot even begin to imagine the pain they feel, but to have it compounded with such a heinous, sickening act after the fact? You would have to sedate me for the rest of my life. One – so that I would not be awake to deal with reality, and Two, because I would be stalking that young man with a lasso, machete, and George Foreman grill for the rest of my life. (And should I find him? Anthony Hopkins would be on speed dial and some fava beans would be simmering on the stove.)

Thankfully, while domestic tragedies do occur daily, they do not typically play out to such a sickening degree.

But I am also aware that when push comes to shove, some people do react in a King of the Beasts type way. To that end, I made it clear to my own husband – if he ever gets that angry with me, or just wants out to pursue his animal lust for another big breasted mammal, the answer is fairly simple...

Leave the cutlery and olive oil out of it. Just ask me to leave.

I might be steamed. But I will certainly not be burned up about it.

Comments

[Diane]

Just a couple notes here: 1) Having schizophrenia does not mean you have multiple personalities. That's multiple personality disorder, and it's extremely rare, whereas schizophrenia is not. 2) While I would never condone or support anyone cutting a person up (I have trouble cutting steak. If it's too tough, I get grossed out and give it to the dog,) let's not rule out the possibility that, as least in the case of the Brazilian woman, that her husband may have abused her for years, pushing her to this heinous crime.

[Audrey F]

I second that WTF emotion! I am always at a loss when people go over the edge and do the dumbest things. Do any of them watch the 9,999 CSI shows on the tube? Or do they think they are soooooo clever that they will never be caught? I am all over the leaving thing--especially if you feel so enraged that you actually entertain the idea of killing someone. There is nothing a whole lot of distance and a little anti-depressant won't cure!

[raji]

Hi All,
This is raji.
This site deals with divorce and it's related to family

http://www.divorcelawyers.com

[DeDe]

Addendum: I say supposedly and apparently because I have no doubt in my mind that some lawyer will try to pass one or both of these cases off to some sort of mental disease or defect. It would not surprise me to hear that the college student, for instance, was a schizophrenic and that one of his other personalities committed the crime. So even though he confessed, I'm still waiting for the other shoe to drop. And when it does, it will prove once again how many people are not willing to take responsibility for their own actions, punishment for their own crimes. So until I hear that he has received the death penalty [I love Texas!] and exhausted all his appeals, I will continue to wait for him to use a legal loophole. And don't give me any anti-death penalty crap. As a mom, if someone does this to my daughter, I would want them dead. Period. I mean, her parents cannot even see her for a last time at the funeral thanks to this a$$hole. So, yeah, I want him to die and I hope he burns in hell! [Love to use that Samuel L. Jackson quote--sue me.]

[DeDe]

I...I've read this blog 3 times now and cannot come up with one thing to say that doesn't involve the letters WTF. I keep trying to figure out how out-of-your-mind with anger/hate/venom/twistedness one has to be to carve up and cook another human being. WTF! You know, something just occurred to me... In addition to the parents and family of the deceased being upset, imagine being the family of the person who [supposedly] committed these crimes. To know that someone you love has [apparently] done this to another person has to be devastating. To know that your child has that kind of disturbing evil inside him or her just cannot sit well with you. I know it wouldn't with me.
For the rest of your life, you're going to be the mom of the kid who carved up his girlfriend or the dad of the woman who fried up her husband and kept the remains in your house. That's going to take lots of counseling and help from a much higher power to get through all that. Both families are suffering terribly and for what? Because one person fell out of love with another person and wanted to move on? WTF! People never cease to amaze me with the level of despair they can cause each other. The depths of evil you have to go to in order to even consider doing something like this is just astounding. Never in a million years would it occur to me to chop up my exes. NEVER.
WTF is wrong with people? Ever heard of karma? What goes around comes around? Do unto others as you would have done unto you? Nowhere in any teachings I've ever heard or read does it say to kill your exes in heinous ways. WTF, WTF, WTF!!

[Amy]

Sandy in NC said...And if there is any justice, you'll know about it when it happens!

Amen Sandy!!!

[Sandy in NC]

It does boggle the mind the things people can do to each other. Having been through divorce, and some misery leading up to it, I can somewhat understand crimes of passion. I think most people might be surprised at what you might do (or THINK about doing) when you are pushed far enough. But having been raised with good old Catholic guilt, I felt badly enough just THINKING the evil things my ex deserved so of course I could never actually DO any of them!

I wonder what actually causes someone to cross that line? I guess in all relationships, it just comes down to basic respect. Have enough respect for the other person to leave if you have plans to humiliate and hurt him or her. And have enough respect for yourself to just leave when you are being hurt and humiliated. Life is too short to be miserable or stay miserable. I firmly believe in what goes around comes around - the inflictor of the misery will one day get it back in spades. And if there is any justice, you'll know about it when it happens!

[Mom of 5]

One of my favorite movies is "Fried Green Tomatoes." Anyone remember that scene where the wife-beatin' husband is killed, stewed, and served to the poor, unsuspectin' folk at the town social and the killer got away with it? It was poetic justice in the movie, sure, but in real life? That's pure evil to do that to another human being.

[Wendy]

I saw that in the news and whenI read it I thought the same thing. "How in the world did the remains ,(cooked or not) stay under the stairs and she not smell them? And then I had to think it out and think to myself, ok...she did cut him up and FRY him after all...maybe she wasn't to right bright to begin with! lol I just have to say I enjoy your blogs. You are so right on with so many of your comments.

[Amy]

I'm so with you on this one, Linda. It just boggles the mind that people don't have the ability to walk away from a relationship without causing physical harm...Whatever happened to "I want a divorce"...Or..."This isn't working out"?

I guess those phrases are just too run of the mill. People just wanna get much more creative with their breakups. I remember being appalled when as a newly-wed I first moved to Connecticut and was assaulted with the non-stop coverage of Helle Crafts' murder, at the hands of her husband Richard. You were hard pressed to go anywhere without seeing t-shirts emblazoned with wood-chippers and captioned with "Divorce...Connecticut-Style".
Fast forward eighteen years to Modesto, California and Scott Peterson, who didn't have the balls to ask his pregnant wife Lacey for a divorce...so he made her an offer she couldn't refuse...and you know the rest of the cliche, too gruesome to recount. Honestly, couldn't he have been man enough to let the woman live and raise her son...*sigh*...
Now these two horrific crimes reported within a 24 hour span. It's just amazing to me, that people are unable to respect life and walk away...when did life become so cheap...*sigh*...