A Change Is Gonna Come - And With It Bring Aches, Pains, Arthritus, Incontinence, Bad Vision, Osteoporosis, Floppy Weiners...
Mary Lou sent this one to me this morning - nothing like a painful laugh to start your day, huh? (Oh well, sometimes the truth hurts...) Enjoy and then chime in with some of your own... I'd like to start by suggesting Viagra think about using that big Righteous Brothers hit for their next marketing campaign...You've Lost That Lovin' Feeling...or maybe The Scooter Store can buy the rights to the Beach Boys, I Get Around?
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It was fun being a baby boomer... until now. Some of the artists of the 60's are revising their hits with new lyrics to accommodate aging baby boomers.
They include:
Herman's Hermits--- Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Walker.
Ringo Starr--- I Get By With a Little Help From Depends.
The Bee Gees--- How Can You Mend a Broken Hip.
Bobby Darin--- Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' a Flash.
Roberta Flack--- The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face.
Johnny Nash--- I Can't See Clearly Now.
Paul Simon--- Fifty Ways to Lose Your Liver
The Commodores--- Once, Twice, Three Times to the Bathroom.
Marvin Gaye--- Heard It Through the Grape Nuts.
Procol Harem--- A Whiter Shade of Hair.
Leo Sayer--- You Make Me Feel Like Napping.
The Temptations--- Papa's Got a Kidney Stone.
Abba--- Denture Queen.
Tony Orlando--- Knock 3 Times On The Ceiling If You Hear Me Fall.
Helen Reddy--- I Am Woman, Hear Me Snore.
Leslie Gore ---- It's My Procedure, and I'll Cry If I Want To.
Willie Nelson--- On the Commode Again
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I'll add...
The Beatles - I Saw Her Hunched Over There, and I Wanna Hold Your Hand (and check for a pulse)
The Temptations - Ain't Too Proud To Beg (Help! I've fallen and I can't get up!)
Led Zepplin - Dazed and Confused (Dammit, where did I put my car keys!!!!)
Martha & The Vandellas - Peein' In The Sheets
The Who - I Can't See For Miles (let alone ten feet in front of me - where are my $^%^%%! bi-focals?)
We will we will shock you (with the defib paddles)......Queen
Here comes the runs (sun)...Beatles
Who are you? Who Who Who Who?? - The Who
Tie a catheter around the old oak tree (cause I gotta pee!) Tony Orlando
Posted by:Jamie in WI | Monday, May 12, 2008 at 09:31 AM
Papa's Got a Kidney Stone - James Brown
Help Me Rhonda (Get Me outta my Chair) - The Beach Boys
Posted by:Nikki | Monday, May 12, 2008 at 11:32 AM
War - Slow Driver (Low Rider) - get the #@*& out of my way!!!
Michael Jackson - Beat It (oh wait - that was going to be for a Viagara commercial - never mind)....
America - A House With No Name (damn memory - where do I live again?)
Jessi Colter - I'm Not Lisa (who the hell are you??)
Posted by:Ame in upstate NY | Monday, May 12, 2008 at 12:43 PM
Chicago - 25 or 624 (What IS my address again?)
REO Speedwagon - I Can't Fight This Feelin Anymore (I gotta pee!!)
Beatles - While My Colostomy Bag Gently Weeps
Posted by:Cheryl S | Monday, May 12, 2008 at 01:06 PM
Ha, Ha, Ha!!!
(I'm not clever enough to think up any song titles, but enjoyed all the creations)
Posted by:Theresa from Virginia | Monday, May 12, 2008 at 03:12 PM
Wham - Wake Me Up (Before I Go Go Pee In My Bed)
Posted by:Vickie | Tuesday, May 13, 2008 at 07:51 AM