Give Me A Big, Fat Break

The human interest story making the news rounds today comes out of England, North Tyneside, to be exact.

It concerns an eight year old child, Connor McCreaddie, and the proposal by British childcare workers to have him removed from his mother’s "care" on the grounds of neglect.

I put the word "care" in quotation marks because under Nicola McKeown’s – the boy’s mother - stellar parenting, he weighs over 200 pounds.

Eight years old and he weighs twice as much as me at 40.  In fact, he weighs more than my three children combined.

With studies showing Britain has the worst rate of obesity among children in Europe, social workers were prepared to intervene in an attempt to save his life. According to healthcare officials, at the rate the child is going, his life expectancy currently stands at 30 years.

To those of you who emailed this morning asking if I have an opinion, I reply: "Duh."

Of course I have an opinion. Actually I have quite a few on this story.

1. Nicola is worthless as a parent.

But then, she belongs to a large club. The Society of Parents Who Let Their Children Call The Shots.

She claims she cannot stop him from eating all the junk food and that he spits out fruits and vegetables.

Hey, Nicola. If you don’t buy it, he can’t eat it. And if he spits out the good stuff? Let him starve. And when he begins to whine, as has been his main method of thwarting any attempts to curb his every-20-minutes-cookie-binging? Buy yourself some earplugs and tell him to shut the *(&@ up.

Once he realizes his only option is the "good stuff", he'll eat it.

A normal breakfast for Connor has been a large bowl of chocolate cereal with a toast and processed lunchmeat chaser. Snacks abound as he awaits the noon chime for lunch which is made up of four hamburgers, fries, sausages, and sometimes a whole pizza. Dinner is routinely more take out junk food, four bags of potato chips and ice cream. Snacking continues till bedtime.

Lather, rinse, repeat the next day.

Speaking of lathering, poor Connor is so large he has trouble bathing himself.

I simply cannot understand the number of parents in this world who give birth and simultaneously pushed out all vestiges of a spine. Saying "no" to your child may not be the easiest thing in the world, but it’s your job. Children need guidance, they need expectations, they need consequences for their actions, and they need rules.

And if they want a continuous stream of McDonald’s and Oreos? Shove some broccoli in their mouth and drive past the drive thru.

2. The government cannot adopt every obese child.

An unidentified health official was quoted as telling The Sunday Times that taking custody of Connor would be a last resort, but said the family had repeatedly failed to attend appointments with nurses, nutritionists and social workers.

That social workers were attempting to remove Connor is laughable to me. Look around – in Britain, in America – obese children are everywhere. And chances are their parents are not exactly at the Paris Hilton end of the weight spectrum. (Connor’s mother is certainly not setting herself up as a role model for good health.)

For those of you ready to pounce on me for "hatin' on the chubby people" - STOP. I have complete sympathy for those people who struggle with real, physiological issues which contribute to excess weight. I do not, however, shed any tears for those who choose their supersized lot by refusing to stop supersizing their meals. And Connor's weight is completely self-inflicted, and parent sanctioned.

The fat apple does not fall far from the girthy tree, but as irresponsible as it is to raise children who turn out so overweight, it is not any government’s job to police this issue.

At some point, personal responsibility has to kick in. People have to take a good long look at what they are doing to contribute to this problem. But it’s hard for an adult to truly see themselves for how big they are, let alone take off the lard colored glasses and see their children.

That’s truly the only way to change the problem, however.

Dr. Colin Waine, the director of the National Obesity Forum in Nottingham, England, called Connor's lifestyle "extremely dangerous," adding he is at risk of developing diabetes in his early teens, and cardiovascular and nervous system problems in his 20s.

"He's really at risk of dying by the time he's 30," Waine said.

Dr. Michael Markiewicz, a pediatrician, agreed.

"I'm not saying they can't care for him, but what they are doing is, through the way they are treating him and feeding him, they are slowly killing him," he said.

And if that information cannot open the eyes of Nicola and every other parent on this planet who equate love with Twinkies, I don’t know what else can be done.

Seriously, if a doctor told me that I was threatening the health and life expectancy of my child, I would certainly hope that would be enough of an ass-kick to force a quick and dramatic course correction.

Bottom line? No government can even begin to think they can successfully intervene in the case of childhood obesity.

Only the parents can make the changes necessary to break the obesity cycle and give their children a shot at a healthy life.

But until the doctors figure out how to regrow spines, I have one last opinion to share:

3. FAT CHANCE

Comments

[Sandy in NC]

I love you - common sense in a no-nonsense package with jewels like "lard-colored" glasses thrown in for a good chortle. Geez, I had to put down my Twinkies and Cheez Doodles to comment when I finished reading! :) As much as I hate that parents get blamed for almost everything, in this case, it's completely warranted. The remedy is as simple as you said: Don't buy the junk, kid can't inhale it. He won't be starving anytime soon. The Mom might go insane from the whining for goodies but that's the price you pay for abdicating your parental role for far too long...

[Michelle,RN]

Linda,
I agree with your opinions 100%. However, at this point, the government may have to step in if repeated attempts to reach out to the mother have failed. I'm not saying they have to take the boy away, but how many times does a government official have to say she is"(by)what they are doing is, through the way they are treating him and feeding him, they are slowly killing him" before they maybe press charges against her for abuse? I'm not saying she has to go to jail, but charging her, placing her on probation and subjecting her to daily visits by authorities to police her home for example, undesirable foods, and providing transportation to appointments, or setting up homecare, I suppose they have that in England as we do here, would at least be a step in the right direction. I know we shouldn't judge people by their looks, but the mother does not appear to be the brightest bulb in the pack. It's possible she is a bit slow, perhaps she doesn't really grasp the levity, but most people, mentally challenged or not understand standing in a courtroom before a judge.
Another thing I am wondering, as I have not yet read this anywhere as of yet,is have they tested him for Prader-Willi syndrome? By definition:PWS is a complex genetic disorder that includes...and most specifically, an involuntary urge to eat constantly, which, coupled with a reduced need for calories, leads to severe obesity.
It is a genetic defect, not necessarily inherited, that causes severe, tantrum type behaviors when food is not allowed, they are usually morbidly obese as young children before they are diagnosed, but the diagnosis is looked for at this stage of the game, when a child is so morbidly obese and violent behavior and an insatiable appetite is reported. If he does have Prader-Willi, only behavior modification and medication will help, but it will never go away or be cured. This is something they need to consider ASAP as this would not be the mother's fault, and she needs help desperately to deal with this child for the rest of his life. He literally could eat himself to death, other people with this disease most certainly have.
Thanks for "listening"
-Michelle
(a mom and former morbidly obese child and adult)

[Tiffany]

Linda:

"Hey, Nicola. If you don’t buy it, he can’t eat it. And if he spits out the good stuff? Let him starve. And when he begins to whine, as has been his main method of thwarting any attempts to curb his every-20-minutes-cookie-binging? Buy yourself some earplugs and tell him to shut the *(&@ up."

To take it back to the 80s, "Word." You are my new hero. :-)